Bullwinkle and the Bomb

When I was in First or Second Grade, I made a connection, one which absolutely terrified me.

On Saturday mornings, I got up to watch cartoons.  In those days, the television stations were required to run shows dedicated to the community.  These shows were usually themed around what to do in case of a nuclear attack.  I didn't pay much attention to them because I was waiting for cartoons.

I loved Bugs Bunny, and thought Woody Woodpecker was, well, okay, I guess.  But in my heart of hearts, I thoroughly enjoyed the Rocky and Bullwinkle show.

Rocky and Bullwinkle was more than a flying squirrel and a thick-headed moose.  They also brought Sherman, Peabody, and the Way-Back Machine to the television.  There were Fractured Fairy Tales narrated by the esteemed Edward Everett Horton.  Rocky and Bullwinkle had their nemesis, Boris Badenov with his more intelligent sidekick Natasha.  Rocky and Bullwinkle was a metaphor for the Cold War.

Somewhere along the way, I heard Walter Cronkite talk about the Bomb.  The only thing I could equate it to was the cartoon bomb Boris always seemed to have at his disposal.  Whenever Boris threatened to use the bomb, his plan would backfire and the bomb would explode in Boris' hand or some other benign place.  So why was Walter Cronkite so upset?

Finally, after much consideration, I asked Dad to explain it to me.  He took me to the kitchen window and had me look out.

He asked me, "What do you see?"

"Dark," I replied.

"Do you see the faint glow on the horizon?  That's Columbus."

My mind reeled.  Newark was big, but Columbus, that was BIG!  Columbus had an airport AND a skyscraper. Columbus had a factory where they made airplanes AND an AIR FORCE BASE!!!  COLUMBUS WAS HUGE!

Dad patiently explained that if they, the Russians, those Boris Badenov people, ever dropped a bomb on Columbus, and they would if war came, the bomb would be so big that we would feel it in Alexandria...

I had a hard time going to sleep that night.  Suddenly, I realized the truth behind Bullwinkle and Boris. Suddenly I realized why we had Civilian Defense and CONELRAD and why the AM radio dial in the car had the Emergency Broadcast stations marked and why we hid under our desks in school.  Suddenly, the world was no longer as care-free as I imagined it was.

As I sat there, at the end of the hallway at Doctor's North Hospital, staring at the WBNS-TV tower, I remembered it all over again.  Luci's Toyshop was a much happier place.